February Odd Jobs
February 27 – Points for writing a very amusing ad. Although I must say the whole nudity thing adds a slightly disturbing note to it, but I’m pretty sure it’s a joke. They might be serious about the no work release candidates thing though.
the wheat from the chaff
..packing up and moving north, to where my kids can rub their grubby little
hands in the rich silted soil of the fecund pioneer valley. i need help --
non-flaky, no excuses, self-motivated, enough common sense to put the
breakable stuff on top -- in other words, a few kindred spirits who can find
their behinds with both hands, can pour beer out of a boot if the directions
are on the sole, etc. no mandatory nudity. moving isn't so much fun -- so no
sighers, whiners, rotarians, or work release candidates. for those who help
me out in this pinch the rewards will be in this world; of this one may rest
assured. let's hear from you; time's a'wasting.
Compensation: ten bucks an hour plus some great gimmes
February 26 – I don’t think driving a cab counts as being a Chauffeur, but I'm sure glad that thing dropped of my record.
I have to point out that it's a little strange that they ask for professionals only, but in the next sentence mention free training.
Compensation: $10-20 /hr.
February 25 – Finally my chance to be a Bond girl. You know just last night I was lamenting the fact that I’d never get to be one and then this comes along. Wow.
We are hosting a James Bond themed party for our seventh annual Valentine's
Day party. We need someone to attend the party as the golden girl from the
James Bond film, Goldfinger. This does NOT involve nudity! We will provide
gold body paint (designed for this purpose and certified non-toxic, washes
off with water and soap); you choose an appropriate outfit to go along. Your
job will be to dress the part and attend the party along with the rest of
our guests. The party is a dress-up affair and we have DJ music; it is often
described as the party of the year by the guests. You must be able to show
proof that you are 21 or older as we serve alcohol at the party.
Compensation: $40/2 hours (10pm-12am); $60/3 hours (9:30pm-12:30am)
February 24 – It’s time to brush up on those fake accents.
International
models needed for MAGIC fashion show in Las Vegas.
Compensation: $200-500 per day
February 23 – I wonder if this sort of thing could get you arrested for solicitation. Okay I’m kidding, mostly.
Looking
for someone to hold our sign on the street and flip it around to attract
business to our massage clinic. This will be a first so we will have to see
which times produce the best results. Probably in the mornings say 9-11a.m.
and the afternoons say 2-5. Experience not necessary but preferable.
Compensation: 8-10 p/hr
February 20 – With all the tech jobs falling by the wayside, maybe this is really the wave of the future. You know man against nature, enjoying the outdoors, just you and the stars; all that stuff. Although it has been kinda cold lately so hopefully the sleeping trailer has a heater of some sort.
Experienced
goatherders wanted part time/seasonal
We are looking for experienced goatherders who also have skills working with border collies. Prefer some education in the ecological or life sciences field but experience is the must. Will be working with a local vegetation management company which also does fire mitigation and habitat restoration. Pay is by project. Overnight site supervision of herds. Must be comfortable in the out of doors, working alone and roughing it. Sleeping trailer provided. Potential to become more of a mainstay in our company. Excellent for students.
February
19 – Ads like this always make me curious, Why does this person want this
sketch? Why just the building and nothing else? Maybe it’s to impress a
girl. In the movies the guy always pretends to have some great talent to
impress a girl.
Need
Pencil Sketch Artist for small project
I
am in need of someone to draw a simple pencil sketch for me. The sketch is
of an Irish Abbey. The approx. dimensions of the sketch are 10 x
12 or smaller. You will be asked to only sketch the abbey not the
surroundings. I need to get this started soon so please contact me via email
if interested. If you have any similar work that you can attach to your
email I would really appreciate it. Thank you!
Compensation: 30.00
February
18 – This job seems pretty easy for the money, I wonder if there’s a
catch.
The job includes helping with setting up, loading and unloading van, and
other light duties when guests are present in the house. You must have a car
and a telephone and be on call prior to the marriage ceremony. Please send
me an email if you are interested in helping with your time. Pay assured on
the same day.
Please send an email to one of the addresses below. We will be corresponding
that way for now.
PS: Only serious persons need apply.
Thanks
Compensation: $400 ( A total of 12 hours' work)
February
17 - I guess it’s good that
your surfing instructor would know CPR although hopefully you’d never have
to find out first hand. I must say that it’s a good thing they listed
knowing how to surf as a requirement for the surf instructor job.
We
are currently looking for part time surf instructors. Instructors MUST have
their lifesaving certificate from the Red Cross.
Instructors must know hot to surf, be patient, kind, responsible, and
professional.
Compensation: $12 per hour
February
16 – I always thought it would be super interesting to be a
private investigator. I know what you’re thinking, but this is Classy
Reality TV (if there is such a thing). More like a documentary even.
Hi Ladies. We're producing a pilot and we're looking for an actress who can
go undercover with our on-camera PI as he investigates a crime. We need an
elegant, high class looking woman who will act as the PI's assistant while
trailing the suspect. You should be in your mid 20s- mid 30s. Please e-mail
pictures and resumes a.s.a.p.
The shoot might be a day or two of work. You will not be in any danger, our
investigator is a real investigator and intends on upholding the law.
February
13 – If she’s such a great
friend, why doesn’t he help her?
Help
my cute friend move/ $12 an hour
You don't need to drive her anywhere ... she needs help hitching her car,
moving some boxes into the truck and her dresser. My friends is very little
and cannot move these things herself. I would really appreciate it ... she
is moving to San Francisco and cannot do it w/o your help!
Compensation: $12/hour
February
12 – I would totally shop at
a store that had a magician on staff.
Looking
for a Magician for possible upcoming work
Looking
for a knowledgeable, responsible, good magician for upcoming work at my
store. Please call or e-mail if interested to
Thank you!
Compensation: Minim+Commission
February
11 – Finally a reality show
that serves some useful purpose. Although I think MTV should change their
name to RTV since they mostly show reality shows now.
****CAR
MAKEOVER SHOW*****
Do you or one of your friend's drive a piece of junk...as in, you are
totally embarrassed to be seen in this car? Do you desperately dream of
having a better ride?
Never fear! MTV is here to save your reputation and give your car a MAD
MAKEOVER! Did we mention that we pay for EVERYTHING?!
Requirements:
* You must have a REALLY bad car (ie: tailpipe dragging, lights busted,
rusted out, paint chipped, stereo shot, dents and dings everywhere etc...)
In short, your car really sucks!
* Be between 18-23 yrs. old
* Live in or around the Los Angeles Area.
If you meet these requirements then send an email ASAP to:
Compensation: TBD-$10.00-$20,000.
February
10 – Only in LA. The whole $200 fee thing seems weird. Is he charging them
a base and they get everything over that? The word fee implies they’ll be
paying for it. Or is that just his way of saying he’ll pay them that.
I am moving and I am looking for one or two people to organize and run a
Garage Sale. Your duties will include everything necessary for a successful
Garage Sale: advertise, display, sell, demonstrate and clean up.
Compensation: $200 Fee
February
9 – I thought these were all
imported from England.
Butler
position
Looking
to hire an excellent, 6 day a week, live-in butler for a formal household.
Must have good credit history, great references and a strong attention to
detail. The ideal candidate will provide service with a touch of class!
Compensation: salary open
February
6 – Why is it the picky ones
are also always the cheap ones. If you’re going to be that particular, pay
more than $6 an hour or just do it yourself.
help
me move in
I
am moving. I need help moving in and organizing my closets. I need someone
to help me to unpack boxes, do laundry, iron, fold, and assemble my closet.
This job will take at least one day, if not more.
Please note that I am very picky about how things are done, and I would like
to have my closets be immaculate.
Compensation: $6/hr
February
5 –This one’s odd alright. Only
$10 an hour, this job sounds like it would be a huge pain in the ass.
Home
Depot Shopping for Supplies
This is no doubt not the strangest thing you've seen. We are doing a team
building event in Las Vegas and we need someone local to do some shopping
for the list that follows. We will pay for all stuff in advance as needed
but we do need to make sure that you buy it and drop it off. (Some stuff may
not be available at Home Depot. We are coming into Vegas the night of
January 31st so we need it ideally on Sunday, February 1st dropped off to
our hotel. Here is the list, please email me with interest.
12 bags of foam pipe insulation 3/8” – each bag should contain 4 three
foot lengths (48 3’ lengths total)
3 Deflect-O 4 In. X 8 Ft. Silver Semi-Rigid Aluminum Duct for Dryer Venting
4 in. diameter by 8 ft. length, pure aluminum, silver color. Fire-resistant
and semi-rigid but flexible for easy installation. Compressed length for
storage.
Home Depot Internet/Catalog # 197105
Store SKU# 186627
Price: $6.73/ea
30 Nibco 3/4 In. PVC 90 Deg. Street Elbow
Home Depot Internet/Catalog # 640794
Price: $0.73/ea
300 one foot lengths of colonial outside corner bone white pre-finished
molding
(this stuff is light, they should cut for you in the store, comes in
different lengths, 8 foot, etc. – whatever length it is we need 300 one
foot lengths cut)
20 bags of rubber bands
10 beach balls
9 big bags balloons (144)
150 four foot long bamboo stakes
150 two foot long bamboo stakes
20 rolls 3M masking tape
1 box of garbage bags
8 bags marbles – preferably each is a different color
120 $10,000 bills - fake money (or if you can’t find, try $100,000 bills
or we can make them
February
4 – Make it stop. First of all writers everywhere are going hungry because
of reality TV. And secondly, learn where to DRAW THE LINE (Sorry about
yelling, but this is just soo bad) talk about mining people’s pain for
ratings. Although on second thought, I think I might know a bitter divorced
guy who would be perfect for this, maybe I’ll send him an email.
CASTING
-- Divorced Men for hot new Reality Show
If
you’re currently divorced, we want to hear from you! Divorce Stories, a
new network reality show is casting for men, over 21, who have been divorced
in the last 5 years. Finally, it’s a chance to tell your side of the
story!
Let us know your age, phone, the best time to reach you and tell us briefly
about your divorce and your ex-wife.
February
3 – Now this is just mean. At least the people who sing badly in American
Idol make their own decision to be humiliated.
And 50-100 bucks, people will sell out a friend for 50-100 bucks? How
sad.
Do you know someone who sings all the time and they are not good?
Do you know someone who is a secret singer? Do they sing out loud in the
car, shower, when cleaning the house, when they think no one is listening?
New reality TV show has a way of making them a star. We are looking for all
ages, styles, and vocal abilities. YOU CANNOT SUBMIT YOURSELF. You have to
nominate friends, families, co-workers, etc.
The only deal is YOU CANNOT TELL THEM ABOUT THIS. This show has a surprise
element, so you must really know them well.
There is a prize at stake if you can provide us with some real and
undiscovered talent. Thank you and good luck.
Compensation: $50-$100 + Prizes
February
2 – How boring, the OWNER’s a celebrity NOT the dog. I was totally
looking forward to having the chance to walk a famous dog. Also if the celebrity
id un-named in the film and music industry how can they be famous? I mean if
no one knows their name? Alright so I’m reaching.
Dog
walker.
Looking for a bright, motivated, outspoken Dog walker for Muki (rare
Japanese Chin) and Jake (miniature Chihuahua).
Celebrity un-named-
In film and music industry
Compensation: 20$ Hour + Free meal